Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Limiting beliefs stifle success
Most of us with ADHD tend to be sensitive individuals. Sure, it's good to be considerate of others.
However, being sensitive to negative beliefs is a serious problem. Admonitions, threats, and the frustration and anger expressed to us through others impress our minds with negative beliefs: "You're not good enough." "You can't do that." "It will never work." "You are weird, crazy, lazy, and will never amount to anything." "You are a failure."
Limiting beliefs come from parents, teachers, and others who have a role in our care as we progress through childhood.
I'm not excusing those who filled my head with failure, but, in my case, I can understand how symptoms of my ADHD played havoc with them. Most caregivers have our best interests at heart, and would do no intentional harm.
Unfortunately, repeated remarks stemming from others frustration at our ADHD behaviors, become deeply engrained on our unconscious. Therefore, we play out our belief of no-good, trouble-maker, failure who always forgets,and never listens or follows direction.
Or, we change the limiting beliefs.
We do this using the same principle of mind that created the belief in limitations. Of course, we have but one mind, but it serves two functions. We generally refer to the two functions as conscious and unconscious, or objective and subjective. Think of the conscious mind as the thought or thinking component and of the unconscious as making thoughts materialize.
Using the principle of mind, what is impressed is expressed, use the objective mind to reframe negative beliefs into positive affirmations and thoughts. Keep affirmations short and to the point using the present tense. The unconscious mind does not reason, or distinguish nuances. As you say it, is exactly how it accepts it. Avoid words or phrases containing someday, tomorrow, soon, I'd like, etc.
Visualize.
In fact, use all of the senses possible as you see yourself making good decisions, being a good listener, performing responsibly, making good grades, receiving raises, promotions, winning awards, reaching goals, and contributing successfully to your community and country. Feel it, see it, hear it, and taste it.
When is the best time to do this? Anytime is good. But, just before arising while in the drowsy state, and just before falling asleep at night are two of the best times for planting new seeds of thoughts. In addition to this, set aside a few minutes throughout the day sitting quietly, visualizing and affirming new behaviors.
Remember, you are not controlled by remarks, thinking, or actions of others unless you allow it. Appoint your conscious mind as the watchguard for your thoughts. Avoid limiting beliefs.
Let you determine what is true about you.
Readers of this blog know that I endorse the use of the energy modality EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to identify root causes of limiting beliefs. For a limited time, this site offers a FREE EFT Manual Download.
Learn how I convert my articles to LIVE TALKING videos in just 0.97 cents!
http://www.articlevideorobot.com/specialoffer/pkeene
However, being sensitive to negative beliefs is a serious problem. Admonitions, threats, and the frustration and anger expressed to us through others impress our minds with negative beliefs: "You're not good enough." "You can't do that." "It will never work." "You are weird, crazy, lazy, and will never amount to anything." "You are a failure."
Limiting beliefs come from parents, teachers, and others who have a role in our care as we progress through childhood.
I'm not excusing those who filled my head with failure, but, in my case, I can understand how symptoms of my ADHD played havoc with them. Most caregivers have our best interests at heart, and would do no intentional harm.
Unfortunately, repeated remarks stemming from others frustration at our ADHD behaviors, become deeply engrained on our unconscious. Therefore, we play out our belief of no-good, trouble-maker, failure who always forgets,and never listens or follows direction.
Or, we change the limiting beliefs.
We do this using the same principle of mind that created the belief in limitations. Of course, we have but one mind, but it serves two functions. We generally refer to the two functions as conscious and unconscious, or objective and subjective. Think of the conscious mind as the thought or thinking component and of the unconscious as making thoughts materialize.
Using the principle of mind, what is impressed is expressed, use the objective mind to reframe negative beliefs into positive affirmations and thoughts. Keep affirmations short and to the point using the present tense. The unconscious mind does not reason, or distinguish nuances. As you say it, is exactly how it accepts it. Avoid words or phrases containing someday, tomorrow, soon, I'd like, etc.
Visualize.
In fact, use all of the senses possible as you see yourself making good decisions, being a good listener, performing responsibly, making good grades, receiving raises, promotions, winning awards, reaching goals, and contributing successfully to your community and country. Feel it, see it, hear it, and taste it.
When is the best time to do this? Anytime is good. But, just before arising while in the drowsy state, and just before falling asleep at night are two of the best times for planting new seeds of thoughts. In addition to this, set aside a few minutes throughout the day sitting quietly, visualizing and affirming new behaviors.
Remember, you are not controlled by remarks, thinking, or actions of others unless you allow it. Appoint your conscious mind as the watchguard for your thoughts. Avoid limiting beliefs.
Let you determine what is true about you.
Readers of this blog know that I endorse the use of the energy modality EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to identify root causes of limiting beliefs. For a limited time, this site offers a FREE EFT Manual Download.
Learn how I convert my articles to LIVE TALKING videos in just 0.97 cents!
http://www.articlevideorobot.com/specialoffer/pkeene
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
When it ain't workin' Don't force it!
You can take this one to the bank: You will never get results using mental coercion.
Since ADHD is a mind disorder, using mind to manage its symptoms makes sense. However, understanding how the mind works is crucial. Your mind responds to your thoughts whether positive or negative. This is good, but on the other hand, it sabotages efforts for success.
For example, let's use the common symptom procrastination. You have a project that must be completed. You make note of it in your mind, write it on the calendar, and list it as a priority on your to do list. The task is in your conscious mind as long as you think about it, talk about it, or entertain thoughts about it. The task is in your unconscious mind as well. Our knowledge of the brain assures us that once the idea of the task is accepted by the unconscious, it will act on it-make it happen. All you need is confidence and faith that tomorrow morning you will start work on the project and complete it as listed.
Sounds good until the ADHD steps in and feeds the unconscious mind negative thoughts. From whatever source, negative thoughts reflect lack of confidence, usually based in fear. Leading up to the procrastination may be the seemingly harmless thought, "Actually, I can still complete this project if I wait until Tuesday or Wednesday to start work on it." You think this with conviction and confidence and alas! the unconscious accepts the idea wholeheartedly. Even though it is written on Monday's To Do list, you can be assured that you won't get around to it until Tuesday or Wednesday.
That first thought begins the chain of negative thinking. "It's going to be hard." "I may never get it finished." "It isn't going to be right, even if I get it finished." "I wish I hadn't taken this on." And the negative thoughts, self-talk in your mind continue.
How do you change this?
Start with constructive thinking. Do not allow negative thoughts to take hold. Whenever a negative thought begins, stop it in mid-sentence by affirming the exact opposite. Giving your unconscious mind mixed signals and messages is no different than someone giving you contradicting messages. You don't know what to do, so you do nothing. Your goal is to come to a distinct, crystal clear message in your conscious mind. The unconscious will bring the message to fruition.
Coercion, will power, and mental force will not bring successful results. It takes a relaxed, confident, assuring mind with clear input to achieve desired results.
Visualization, or imagination will boost your ability to achieve. Allow no negativity while you picture positive outcomes. See it, feel it, hear it, smell it, taste it-Believe it!
The work you put into monitoring, guarding, and changing your thoughts will be well rewarded. Your mind is powerful. Use it.
Since ADHD is a mind disorder, using mind to manage its symptoms makes sense. However, understanding how the mind works is crucial. Your mind responds to your thoughts whether positive or negative. This is good, but on the other hand, it sabotages efforts for success.
For example, let's use the common symptom procrastination. You have a project that must be completed. You make note of it in your mind, write it on the calendar, and list it as a priority on your to do list. The task is in your conscious mind as long as you think about it, talk about it, or entertain thoughts about it. The task is in your unconscious mind as well. Our knowledge of the brain assures us that once the idea of the task is accepted by the unconscious, it will act on it-make it happen. All you need is confidence and faith that tomorrow morning you will start work on the project and complete it as listed.
Sounds good until the ADHD steps in and feeds the unconscious mind negative thoughts. From whatever source, negative thoughts reflect lack of confidence, usually based in fear. Leading up to the procrastination may be the seemingly harmless thought, "Actually, I can still complete this project if I wait until Tuesday or Wednesday to start work on it." You think this with conviction and confidence and alas! the unconscious accepts the idea wholeheartedly. Even though it is written on Monday's To Do list, you can be assured that you won't get around to it until Tuesday or Wednesday.
That first thought begins the chain of negative thinking. "It's going to be hard." "I may never get it finished." "It isn't going to be right, even if I get it finished." "I wish I hadn't taken this on." And the negative thoughts, self-talk in your mind continue.
How do you change this?
Start with constructive thinking. Do not allow negative thoughts to take hold. Whenever a negative thought begins, stop it in mid-sentence by affirming the exact opposite. Giving your unconscious mind mixed signals and messages is no different than someone giving you contradicting messages. You don't know what to do, so you do nothing. Your goal is to come to a distinct, crystal clear message in your conscious mind. The unconscious will bring the message to fruition.
Coercion, will power, and mental force will not bring successful results. It takes a relaxed, confident, assuring mind with clear input to achieve desired results.
Visualization, or imagination will boost your ability to achieve. Allow no negativity while you picture positive outcomes. See it, feel it, hear it, smell it, taste it-Believe it!
The work you put into monitoring, guarding, and changing your thoughts will be well rewarded. Your mind is powerful. Use it.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
5 Steps in Making a To Do List Work
Yes! I have a To Do list. I made the form myself and fill it in at each day's end, ready to go for the next day.
The ADHD mind plays amazing, but deceptive tricks. I fill in the spaces from 1-10 and believe great things will happen. Projects will fly off my desk, signed, sealed, and delivered.
Reality kicks in. The purpose of the To Do list is to increase productivity by prioritizing tasks, completing each one, and moving to the next. Its purpose is not to master the art of making a list.
When I discovered changing the date on my list was all that was necessary, I realized something was wrong. Something that creating a new form wasn't going to fix.
Avoiding tasks is usually fear-based. Many of us, admittedly or not, are perfectionists. We put off tasks fearing the end product will be less than perfect. Or, perhaps we don't feel qualified to complete the task. The logic, usually unconscious, is how can we fail at something we don't attempt? If I never finish my novel who can say it wouldn't be a best seller? Procrastination haunts most of us with ADHD, and can be damaging. (If you are a notorious procrastinator, I suggest you click the link.)
These 5 steps will revitalize your To Do list, increase your productivity, and make you look procrastination in the eye.
The ADHD mind plays amazing, but deceptive tricks. I fill in the spaces from 1-10 and believe great things will happen. Projects will fly off my desk, signed, sealed, and delivered.
Reality kicks in. The purpose of the To Do list is to increase productivity by prioritizing tasks, completing each one, and moving to the next. Its purpose is not to master the art of making a list.
When I discovered changing the date on my list was all that was necessary, I realized something was wrong. Something that creating a new form wasn't going to fix.
Avoiding tasks is usually fear-based. Many of us, admittedly or not, are perfectionists. We put off tasks fearing the end product will be less than perfect. Or, perhaps we don't feel qualified to complete the task. The logic, usually unconscious, is how can we fail at something we don't attempt? If I never finish my novel who can say it wouldn't be a best seller? Procrastination haunts most of us with ADHD, and can be damaging. (If you are a notorious procrastinator, I suggest you click the link.)
These 5 steps will revitalize your To Do list, increase your productivity, and make you look procrastination in the eye.
- Prioritize tasks into 3 categories: (a) Critical (b) ASAP (c) Needs to be done
- Move the task that you dread most, or least desire, into the number one spot. Do this for each category
- Move the task you most look forward to doing into the second position. Do this for each category
- Order remaining tasks in each category alternating from Most dreaded to Most desired
- Begin with the Critical category and progress through B and C completing each task in turn
The ADHD accomplice, Focus, will try to mess with you. Counteract it by having the second task, and third if necessary, from your list layed out and ready to go. When you lose focus with task one, simply transfer to task two and work on it. Move back to task one and repeat the process.
By the way, make sure you keep returning to task one. Afterall, you don't want procrastination to win.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Attend!
Attend to the moment . . . to the task at hand . . . mindful, heed, observe. Attentive, as in focus on One thing. Wow! Alot to demand from someone with ADHD.
If your ADHD is anything like mine, you have a minimum of four or five things going on in your head at the same time. Each requires attention, or so we think, and we do a darn good job of keeping up. At least until the four or five screens in our head increases to a dozen. That's when someone finds our keys in the refrigerator space that the carton of milk used to occupy.
Attending to what is before us, being mindful of what we are doing is not only possible--it's a necessity. ADHD is a focus problem. I recommend mindfullness as the perfect antidote for inattention.
Don't freak out in ADHD fashion. You can accomplish attending and manage your focus problem by taking little steps to get used to the idea of mindfullness, and progress to keeping full attention on one task at a time. Note: keeping full attention on one task at a time is in italics because it's frightening without the following clarification:
Start the focus exercise while eating a snack. Keep your attention on the eating process. Focus on what you are eating, the color and shape, smell, taste, and texture. How the food feels as you chew and swallow.
When your focus wanders and your mind jumps to a new screen, tap the center of your forehead and bring back the focus to the food you are eating. Repeat this process throughout your snack. Eventually, you will be able to focus throughout an entire meal.
Soon, you can transfer this management exercise to other tasks. Granted, mindful eating is a healthy practice . . . but, eating all day long, maybe not.
If your ADHD is anything like mine, you have a minimum of four or five things going on in your head at the same time. Each requires attention, or so we think, and we do a darn good job of keeping up. At least until the four or five screens in our head increases to a dozen. That's when someone finds our keys in the refrigerator space that the carton of milk used to occupy.
Attending to what is before us, being mindful of what we are doing is not only possible--it's a necessity. ADHD is a focus problem. I recommend mindfullness as the perfect antidote for inattention.
Don't freak out in ADHD fashion. You can accomplish attending and manage your focus problem by taking little steps to get used to the idea of mindfullness, and progress to keeping full attention on one task at a time. Note: keeping full attention on one task at a time is in italics because it's frightening without the following clarification:
This does not mean that you must focus on the task until it is completed. You
focus on the task at hand until you decide to move to a different task. This
requires that your full attention remain on the task at hand until you decide to
stop the task.
Start the focus exercise while eating a snack. Keep your attention on the eating process. Focus on what you are eating, the color and shape, smell, taste, and texture. How the food feels as you chew and swallow.
When your focus wanders and your mind jumps to a new screen, tap the center of your forehead and bring back the focus to the food you are eating. Repeat this process throughout your snack. Eventually, you will be able to focus throughout an entire meal.
Soon, you can transfer this management exercise to other tasks. Granted, mindful eating is a healthy practice . . . but, eating all day long, maybe not.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
5 Reasons not to Color and Label me ADHD
Wow! Everybody and their dog has ADHD. So it seems. The label is used loosely. It's the butt of jokes, laughter and put-downs. That's enough to raise an eyebrow, however, the problem isn't the jokes and put-downs. The label itself creates problems.
- Blame it on my ADHD when I act impulsively, make a mistake, forget to follow through . . . blame it on my ADHD.
- I'm a failure because I have ADHD. Don't you see, I can't do it. It won't work, not for me 'cuz I have ADHD.
- C'mon, cut me some slack, it's hard for me to follow the rules. They don't apply to me, I have ADHD.
- Me change? That is impossible. You see, I have ADHD.
- I can't, I quit, It's no use, I don't care, There's nothing I can do, It's my destiny, Dude. Look around. Some people got all the smarts and know-how, the world on a string . . . look at me, I got ADHD.
Yes, the symptoms are real and they get in my way making it hard for me to do what I should. They sabotage my efforts for success. But, if I let the symptoms of ADHD control me, my entire psyche is at risk. ADHD behaviors left unchecked will destroy my emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual health.
Forgetfullness, procrastination, anger, addiction, lack of self-esteem, laziness, depression, impulsive behavior, focus problems . . . can be successfully managed.
ADHD is a disorder, not an excuse. I am not ADHD. Color and label me, PAUL.
_____________________________
Paul Keene, KeeneHealth LLC
Manage ADHD
http://keenehealth.net/id66.html
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