When it ain't workin' Don't force it!

You can take this one to the bank: You will never get results using mental coercion.

Since ADHD is a mind disorder, using mind to manage its symptoms makes sense. However, understanding how the mind works is crucial. Your mind responds to your thoughts whether positive or negative. This is good, but on the other hand, it sabotages efforts for success.

For example, let's use the common symptom procrastination. You have a project that must be completed. You make note of it in your mind, write it on the calendar, and list it as a priority on your to do list. The task is in your conscious mind as long as you think about it, talk about it, or entertain thoughts about it. The task is in your unconscious mind as well. Our knowledge of the brain assures us that once the idea of the task is accepted by the unconscious, it will act on it-make it happen. All you need is confidence and faith that tomorrow morning you will start work on the project and complete it as listed.

Sounds good until the ADHD steps in and feeds the unconscious mind negative thoughts. From whatever source, negative thoughts reflect lack of confidence, usually based in fear. Leading up to the procrastination may be the seemingly harmless thought, "Actually, I can still complete this project if I wait until Tuesday or Wednesday to start work on it." You think this with conviction and confidence and alas! the unconscious accepts the idea wholeheartedly. Even though it is written on Monday's To Do list, you can be assured that you won't get around to it until Tuesday or Wednesday.

That first thought begins the chain of negative thinking. "It's going to be hard." "I may never get it finished." "It isn't going to be right, even if I get it finished." "I wish I hadn't taken this on." And the negative thoughts, self-talk in your mind continue.

How do you change this?

Start with constructive thinking. Do not allow negative thoughts to take hold. Whenever a negative thought begins, stop it in mid-sentence by affirming the exact opposite. Giving your unconscious mind mixed signals and messages is no different than someone giving you contradicting messages. You don't know what to do, so you do nothing. Your goal is to come to a distinct, crystal clear message in your conscious mind. The unconscious will bring the message to fruition.

Coercion, will power, and mental force will not bring successful results. It takes a relaxed, confident, assuring mind with clear input to achieve desired results.

Visualization, or imagination will boost your ability to achieve. Allow no negativity while you picture positive outcomes. See it, feel it, hear it, smell it, taste it-Believe it!

The work you put into monitoring, guarding, and changing your thoughts will be well rewarded. Your mind is powerful. Use it.

Attend!

Attend to the moment . . . to the task at hand . . . mindful, heed, observe. Attentive, as in focus on One thing. Wow! Alot to demand from someone with ADHD.

If your ADHD is anything like mine, you have a minimum of four or five things going on in your head at the same time. Each requires attention, or so we think, and we do a darn good job of keeping up. At least until the four or five screens in our head increases to a dozen. That's when someone finds our keys in the refrigerator space that the carton of milk used to occupy.

Attending to what is before us, being mindful of what we are doing is not only possible--it's a necessity. ADHD is a focus problem. I recommend mindfullness as the perfect antidote for inattention.

Don't freak out in ADHD fashion. You can accomplish attending and manage your focus problem by taking little steps to get used to the idea of mindfullness, and progress to keeping full attention on one task at a time. Note: keeping full attention on one task at a time is in italics because it's frightening without the following clarification:

This does not mean that you must focus on the task until it is completed. You
focus on the task at hand until you decide to move to a different task. This
requires that your full attention remain on the task at hand until you decide to
stop the task.

Start the focus exercise while eating a snack. Keep your attention on the eating process. Focus on what you are eating, the color and shape, smell, taste, and texture. How the food feels as you chew and swallow.

When your focus wanders and your mind jumps to a new screen, tap the center of your forehead and bring back the focus to the food you are eating. Repeat this process throughout your snack. Eventually, you will be able to focus throughout an entire meal.

Soon, you can transfer this management exercise to other tasks. Granted, mindful eating is a healthy practice . . . but, eating all day long, maybe not.