Most of us with ADHD tend to be sensitive individuals. Sure, it's good to be considerate of others.
However, being sensitive to negative beliefs is a serious problem. Admonitions, threats, and the frustration and anger expressed to us through others impress our minds with negative beliefs: "You're not good enough." "You can't do that." "It will never work." "You are weird, crazy, lazy, and will never amount to anything." "You are a failure."
Limiting beliefs come from parents, teachers, and others who have a role in our care as we progress through childhood.
I'm not excusing those who filled my head with failure, but, in my case, I can understand how symptoms of my ADHD played havoc with them. Most caregivers have our best interests at heart, and would do no intentional harm.
Unfortunately, repeated remarks stemming from others frustration at our ADHD behaviors, become deeply engrained on our unconscious. Therefore, we play out our belief of no-good, trouble-maker, failure who always forgets,and never listens or follows direction.
Or, we change the limiting beliefs.
We do this using the same principle of mind that created the belief in limitations. Of course, we have but one mind, but it serves two functions. We generally refer to the two functions as conscious and unconscious, or objective and subjective. Think of the conscious mind as the thought or thinking component and of the unconscious as making thoughts materialize.
Using the principle of mind, what is impressed is expressed, use the objective mind to reframe negative beliefs into positive affirmations and thoughts. Keep affirmations short and to the point using the present tense. The unconscious mind does not reason, or distinguish nuances. As you say it, is exactly how it accepts it. Avoid words or phrases containing someday, tomorrow, soon, I'd like, etc.
Visualize.
In fact, use all of the senses possible as you see yourself making good decisions, being a good listener, performing responsibly, making good grades, receiving raises, promotions, winning awards, reaching goals, and contributing successfully to your community and country. Feel it, see it, hear it, and taste it.
When is the best time to do this? Anytime is good. But, just before arising while in the drowsy state, and just before falling asleep at night are two of the best times for planting new seeds of thoughts. In addition to this, set aside a few minutes throughout the day sitting quietly, visualizing and affirming new behaviors.
Remember, you are not controlled by remarks, thinking, or actions of others unless you allow it. Appoint your conscious mind as the watchguard for your thoughts. Avoid limiting beliefs.
Let you determine what is true about you.
Readers of this blog know that I endorse the use of the energy modality EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to identify root causes of limiting beliefs. For a limited time, this site offers a FREE EFT Manual Download.
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Showing posts with label unconscious. Show all posts
Showing posts with label unconscious. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
When it ain't workin' Don't force it!
You can take this one to the bank: You will never get results using mental coercion.
Since ADHD is a mind disorder, using mind to manage its symptoms makes sense. However, understanding how the mind works is crucial. Your mind responds to your thoughts whether positive or negative. This is good, but on the other hand, it sabotages efforts for success.
For example, let's use the common symptom procrastination. You have a project that must be completed. You make note of it in your mind, write it on the calendar, and list it as a priority on your to do list. The task is in your conscious mind as long as you think about it, talk about it, or entertain thoughts about it. The task is in your unconscious mind as well. Our knowledge of the brain assures us that once the idea of the task is accepted by the unconscious, it will act on it-make it happen. All you need is confidence and faith that tomorrow morning you will start work on the project and complete it as listed.
Sounds good until the ADHD steps in and feeds the unconscious mind negative thoughts. From whatever source, negative thoughts reflect lack of confidence, usually based in fear. Leading up to the procrastination may be the seemingly harmless thought, "Actually, I can still complete this project if I wait until Tuesday or Wednesday to start work on it." You think this with conviction and confidence and alas! the unconscious accepts the idea wholeheartedly. Even though it is written on Monday's To Do list, you can be assured that you won't get around to it until Tuesday or Wednesday.
That first thought begins the chain of negative thinking. "It's going to be hard." "I may never get it finished." "It isn't going to be right, even if I get it finished." "I wish I hadn't taken this on." And the negative thoughts, self-talk in your mind continue.
How do you change this?
Start with constructive thinking. Do not allow negative thoughts to take hold. Whenever a negative thought begins, stop it in mid-sentence by affirming the exact opposite. Giving your unconscious mind mixed signals and messages is no different than someone giving you contradicting messages. You don't know what to do, so you do nothing. Your goal is to come to a distinct, crystal clear message in your conscious mind. The unconscious will bring the message to fruition.
Coercion, will power, and mental force will not bring successful results. It takes a relaxed, confident, assuring mind with clear input to achieve desired results.
Visualization, or imagination will boost your ability to achieve. Allow no negativity while you picture positive outcomes. See it, feel it, hear it, smell it, taste it-Believe it!
The work you put into monitoring, guarding, and changing your thoughts will be well rewarded. Your mind is powerful. Use it.
Since ADHD is a mind disorder, using mind to manage its symptoms makes sense. However, understanding how the mind works is crucial. Your mind responds to your thoughts whether positive or negative. This is good, but on the other hand, it sabotages efforts for success.
For example, let's use the common symptom procrastination. You have a project that must be completed. You make note of it in your mind, write it on the calendar, and list it as a priority on your to do list. The task is in your conscious mind as long as you think about it, talk about it, or entertain thoughts about it. The task is in your unconscious mind as well. Our knowledge of the brain assures us that once the idea of the task is accepted by the unconscious, it will act on it-make it happen. All you need is confidence and faith that tomorrow morning you will start work on the project and complete it as listed.
Sounds good until the ADHD steps in and feeds the unconscious mind negative thoughts. From whatever source, negative thoughts reflect lack of confidence, usually based in fear. Leading up to the procrastination may be the seemingly harmless thought, "Actually, I can still complete this project if I wait until Tuesday or Wednesday to start work on it." You think this with conviction and confidence and alas! the unconscious accepts the idea wholeheartedly. Even though it is written on Monday's To Do list, you can be assured that you won't get around to it until Tuesday or Wednesday.
That first thought begins the chain of negative thinking. "It's going to be hard." "I may never get it finished." "It isn't going to be right, even if I get it finished." "I wish I hadn't taken this on." And the negative thoughts, self-talk in your mind continue.
How do you change this?
Start with constructive thinking. Do not allow negative thoughts to take hold. Whenever a negative thought begins, stop it in mid-sentence by affirming the exact opposite. Giving your unconscious mind mixed signals and messages is no different than someone giving you contradicting messages. You don't know what to do, so you do nothing. Your goal is to come to a distinct, crystal clear message in your conscious mind. The unconscious will bring the message to fruition.
Coercion, will power, and mental force will not bring successful results. It takes a relaxed, confident, assuring mind with clear input to achieve desired results.
Visualization, or imagination will boost your ability to achieve. Allow no negativity while you picture positive outcomes. See it, feel it, hear it, smell it, taste it-Believe it!
The work you put into monitoring, guarding, and changing your thoughts will be well rewarded. Your mind is powerful. Use it.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Letting Go of the Past is Easy . . . with a magic wand
Live in the present. Live for the day. Let go of the past. Erase the tapes of sordid baggage. This advice is given to us freely by friends, family, self-help gurus, and the beaten who trod the streets. Everyone. Everyone knows (but the person hurting) that this is the path to success.
Good advice. Poof! If we have a magic wand.
Considering that everything from our stint in the womb and perhaps before is recorded in the unconscious, surely the tape extends to infinity. Not sure about your tape, but if the sordid baggage contained on mine was placed in a pile, it would be impressive.
Logically, a good share of this past stuff lies forgotten in the unconscious. Some of it we couldn't retrieve if we wanted. The problem is with the stuff that we do not want. Those recordings that pop up to defeat us. The negative, abusive, self-defeating admonishments and experiences given to us intentionally or unintentionally by enemy or foe.
Included are the sayings and behaviors from parents, teachers, ministers, relatives, baby sitters, and the couple at the corner market. All those who share belief systems that have an impact on our life. Beliefs that sabotaged our past efforts of intention and continue to do so today. For example:
The rich can't get into heaven, Money is the root of all evil, Everyone in our family is big-boned (fat), You aren't good enough, smart enough, Your sister (brother) is the pretty one, smart one, or good one.
Our recordings lie behind the negative emotions and behaviors of fear, lonliness, anger, resentment, worry, depression, and guilt among others. Discovering the "writing on our wall" that lies behind a destructive emotion and behavior clears the body's energy path resulting in emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being.
Fortunately, we do have a magic wand of sorts. Our mind. Yes, the same wand that stores and records our life. The unconscious mind, just like the conscious mind, is designed for our good.
We just need to use it.
___________________________________________________
Learn more about Paul and his management of ADD/ADHD at: http://www.theabcsofadhd.com/About_Us.html
Visit Helping Others Heal at: http://www.keenehealth.net/ and subscribe to the FREE Helping Others Heal newsletter.
Good advice. Poof! If we have a magic wand.
Considering that everything from our stint in the womb and perhaps before is recorded in the unconscious, surely the tape extends to infinity. Not sure about your tape, but if the sordid baggage contained on mine was placed in a pile, it would be impressive.
Logically, a good share of this past stuff lies forgotten in the unconscious. Some of it we couldn't retrieve if we wanted. The problem is with the stuff that we do not want. Those recordings that pop up to defeat us. The negative, abusive, self-defeating admonishments and experiences given to us intentionally or unintentionally by enemy or foe.
Included are the sayings and behaviors from parents, teachers, ministers, relatives, baby sitters, and the couple at the corner market. All those who share belief systems that have an impact on our life. Beliefs that sabotaged our past efforts of intention and continue to do so today. For example:
The rich can't get into heaven, Money is the root of all evil, Everyone in our family is big-boned (fat), You aren't good enough, smart enough, Your sister (brother) is the pretty one, smart one, or good one.
Our recordings lie behind the negative emotions and behaviors of fear, lonliness, anger, resentment, worry, depression, and guilt among others. Discovering the "writing on our wall" that lies behind a destructive emotion and behavior clears the body's energy path resulting in emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being.
Fortunately, we do have a magic wand of sorts. Our mind. Yes, the same wand that stores and records our life. The unconscious mind, just like the conscious mind, is designed for our good.
We just need to use it.
___________________________________________________
Learn more about Paul and his management of ADD/ADHD at: http://www.theabcsofadhd.com/About_Us.html
Visit Helping Others Heal at: http://www.keenehealth.net/ and subscribe to the FREE Helping Others Heal newsletter.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Why Bring up the Past?
I don't advocate spending time in the past. It takes all of the attention we can muster to live in the present. Living in the past is an escape to avoid the present.
I do believe if something from the past keeps popping up it must be important. It doesn't have to be a bad thought. Good thoughts from the past pop up, too. However, when a negative thought keeps jumping in and out of our conscious mind, perhaps we had better take notice.
Life in the present is effected by our past experiences. Notably, we give credit to life's lessons, both pleasant and agonizing, that molded us into who we are today. But, we forget the "lessons" that were presented to us by experiences that left writings on our wall. Messages that we were no good in one way or another. Messages that spoke of unworthiness, shame, guilt and failure. Writings left from both adversaries and friends, teachers, family, and other trusted care takers.
It mattered not whether the messages were delivered with good intentions or malice. The unconscious recorded each and every one without discrimination.
And in the unconscious the recordings remain. Doing their damage by sabotaging our every effort toward success. Exactly why I encourage releasing the negative thoughts that surface to our conscious mind.
Addressing suspect conscious issues may lead to those issues, perhaps core issues, not in our conscious mind. The very culprits we are after.
I do believe if something from the past keeps popping up it must be important. It doesn't have to be a bad thought. Good thoughts from the past pop up, too. However, when a negative thought keeps jumping in and out of our conscious mind, perhaps we had better take notice.
Life in the present is effected by our past experiences. Notably, we give credit to life's lessons, both pleasant and agonizing, that molded us into who we are today. But, we forget the "lessons" that were presented to us by experiences that left writings on our wall. Messages that we were no good in one way or another. Messages that spoke of unworthiness, shame, guilt and failure. Writings left from both adversaries and friends, teachers, family, and other trusted care takers.
It mattered not whether the messages were delivered with good intentions or malice. The unconscious recorded each and every one without discrimination.
And in the unconscious the recordings remain. Doing their damage by sabotaging our every effort toward success. Exactly why I encourage releasing the negative thoughts that surface to our conscious mind.
Addressing suspect conscious issues may lead to those issues, perhaps core issues, not in our conscious mind. The very culprits we are after.
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