Most of us with ADHD tend to be sensitive individuals. Sure, it's good to be considerate of others.
However, being sensitive to negative beliefs is a serious problem. Admonitions, threats, and the frustration and anger expressed to us through others impress our minds with negative beliefs: "You're not good enough." "You can't do that." "It will never work." "You are weird, crazy, lazy, and will never amount to anything." "You are a failure."
Limiting beliefs come from parents, teachers, and others who have a role in our care as we progress through childhood.
I'm not excusing those who filled my head with failure, but, in my case, I can understand how symptoms of my ADHD played havoc with them. Most caregivers have our best interests at heart, and would do no intentional harm.
Unfortunately, repeated remarks stemming from others frustration at our ADHD behaviors, become deeply engrained on our unconscious. Therefore, we play out our belief of no-good, trouble-maker, failure who always forgets,and never listens or follows direction.
Or, we change the limiting beliefs.
We do this using the same principle of mind that created the belief in limitations. Of course, we have but one mind, but it serves two functions. We generally refer to the two functions as conscious and unconscious, or objective and subjective. Think of the conscious mind as the thought or thinking component and of the unconscious as making thoughts materialize.
Using the principle of mind, what is impressed is expressed, use the objective mind to reframe negative beliefs into positive affirmations and thoughts. Keep affirmations short and to the point using the present tense. The unconscious mind does not reason, or distinguish nuances. As you say it, is exactly how it accepts it. Avoid words or phrases containing someday, tomorrow, soon, I'd like, etc.
Visualize.
In fact, use all of the senses possible as you see yourself making good decisions, being a good listener, performing responsibly, making good grades, receiving raises, promotions, winning awards, reaching goals, and contributing successfully to your community and country. Feel it, see it, hear it, and taste it.
When is the best time to do this? Anytime is good. But, just before arising while in the drowsy state, and just before falling asleep at night are two of the best times for planting new seeds of thoughts. In addition to this, set aside a few minutes throughout the day sitting quietly, visualizing and affirming new behaviors.
Remember, you are not controlled by remarks, thinking, or actions of others unless you allow it. Appoint your conscious mind as the watchguard for your thoughts. Avoid limiting beliefs.
Let you determine what is true about you.
Readers of this blog know that I endorse the use of the energy modality EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to identify root causes of limiting beliefs. For a limited time, this site offers a FREE EFT Manual Download.
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Showing posts with label EFT. Show all posts
Showing posts with label EFT. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Friday, May 8, 2009
What's Wrong with Me?
What is wrong with me? I hear this question often, and I ask it more times than I wish to admit. The question often follows a scenario involving home, work, or both. Perhaps it is this.
The sink is full of dirty dishes, the cupboards are lined with crusted pots and pans, and piles of laundry cover couches and beds. The floors need cleaned, and the remains of breakfast are still on the breakfast bar. I can't find the insurance form that needed signed and returned two days ago.
What is wrong with me? I ask, tired and exhausted over a cup of cold coffee.
You know, or think you know, based on what you imagine others think or what they have implied. Heck, even what some have said to your face.
Although you don't want to go there, answers to the question flood your head: lazy, worthless, slob, failure, no-good, mental case, crazy . . .
Your self-esteem is so low that the spatula used to turn the breakfast pancakes is needed to scrape it up from the floor.
Stop! Wallowing in self-pity of being a worthless mom, son, daughter, spouse, worker, friend, lover, provider, employee, employer, partner, person, isn't the answer. Negative thoughts produce more negativity. Look around.
What you see is what your thoughts created.
Before the physical mess that surrounds you can be cleared, the negative feelings in your head must be cleared. You can only clear one dirty dish at a time. Do the same with each destructive concept in your mind.
This is where EFT (http://keenehealth.net/id6.html) does its best work. Take each issue one by one. Tap on the karate chop point and address the issue exactly as you feel it: Even though I am worthless, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Tap the eight basic meridian points on the face, collar bone and under the arm or wrist. Do this until negative emotions or responses of being called worthless cease. Clear them all out. Don't stop until you laugh about the thought of being lazy, crazy, and no-good.
Now, get up and clean up the mess. Or whatever needs done. Begin one step at a time, and continue until the job is done.
The sink is full of dirty dishes, the cupboards are lined with crusted pots and pans, and piles of laundry cover couches and beds. The floors need cleaned, and the remains of breakfast are still on the breakfast bar. I can't find the insurance form that needed signed and returned two days ago.
What is wrong with me? I ask, tired and exhausted over a cup of cold coffee.
You know, or think you know, based on what you imagine others think or what they have implied. Heck, even what some have said to your face.
Although you don't want to go there, answers to the question flood your head: lazy, worthless, slob, failure, no-good, mental case, crazy . . .
Your self-esteem is so low that the spatula used to turn the breakfast pancakes is needed to scrape it up from the floor.
Stop! Wallowing in self-pity of being a worthless mom, son, daughter, spouse, worker, friend, lover, provider, employee, employer, partner, person, isn't the answer. Negative thoughts produce more negativity. Look around.
What you see is what your thoughts created.
Before the physical mess that surrounds you can be cleared, the negative feelings in your head must be cleared. You can only clear one dirty dish at a time. Do the same with each destructive concept in your mind.
This is where EFT (http://keenehealth.net/id6.html) does its best work. Take each issue one by one. Tap on the karate chop point and address the issue exactly as you feel it: Even though I am worthless, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Tap the eight basic meridian points on the face, collar bone and under the arm or wrist. Do this until negative emotions or responses of being called worthless cease. Clear them all out. Don't stop until you laugh about the thought of being lazy, crazy, and no-good.
Now, get up and clean up the mess. Or whatever needs done. Begin one step at a time, and continue until the job is done.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Why Bring up the Past?
I don't advocate spending time in the past. It takes all of the attention we can muster to live in the present. Living in the past is an escape to avoid the present.
I do believe if something from the past keeps popping up it must be important. It doesn't have to be a bad thought. Good thoughts from the past pop up, too. However, when a negative thought keeps jumping in and out of our conscious mind, perhaps we had better take notice.
Life in the present is effected by our past experiences. Notably, we give credit to life's lessons, both pleasant and agonizing, that molded us into who we are today. But, we forget the "lessons" that were presented to us by experiences that left writings on our wall. Messages that we were no good in one way or another. Messages that spoke of unworthiness, shame, guilt and failure. Writings left from both adversaries and friends, teachers, family, and other trusted care takers.
It mattered not whether the messages were delivered with good intentions or malice. The unconscious recorded each and every one without discrimination.
And in the unconscious the recordings remain. Doing their damage by sabotaging our every effort toward success. Exactly why I encourage releasing the negative thoughts that surface to our conscious mind.
Addressing suspect conscious issues may lead to those issues, perhaps core issues, not in our conscious mind. The very culprits we are after.
I do believe if something from the past keeps popping up it must be important. It doesn't have to be a bad thought. Good thoughts from the past pop up, too. However, when a negative thought keeps jumping in and out of our conscious mind, perhaps we had better take notice.
Life in the present is effected by our past experiences. Notably, we give credit to life's lessons, both pleasant and agonizing, that molded us into who we are today. But, we forget the "lessons" that were presented to us by experiences that left writings on our wall. Messages that we were no good in one way or another. Messages that spoke of unworthiness, shame, guilt and failure. Writings left from both adversaries and friends, teachers, family, and other trusted care takers.
It mattered not whether the messages were delivered with good intentions or malice. The unconscious recorded each and every one without discrimination.
And in the unconscious the recordings remain. Doing their damage by sabotaging our every effort toward success. Exactly why I encourage releasing the negative thoughts that surface to our conscious mind.
Addressing suspect conscious issues may lead to those issues, perhaps core issues, not in our conscious mind. The very culprits we are after.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Clearing Out the Past
I discovered eight years ago that if I really wanted the energy to flow it was necessary to remove the junk that compromised or prevented it from flowing through the body. I knew that energy flowed through the body's meridians and all of that, but I never considered that it got blocked.
Those of you who know me on a personal level, through my websites, or from the Helping Others Heal Naturally newsletter know that I am an advocate of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). Through the discovery of EFT, I began to reflect on likely causes of my blockages- the writings on my wall.
God knows there were many possibilities to consider.
As a child trouble seemed to follow me. I wasn't really a bad kid. I just exhibited some behaviors that ticked off some people. People like my teachers, parents, and maybe a few others.
Although the discovery of ADHD had been around, to my knowledge nobody I knew was familiar with or used the term. Looking back, I am certain that I met the criteria for the label since I had the classic "out of the textbook" symptoms.
I must confess that I continue to have many of the symptoms today. However, I have learned to manage them and lead a somewhat normal life-whatever normal means.
Clearing out the junk stored in my unconscious (that raised its ugly self-sabotaging head now and again) got the energy flowing. Not that it flows like a young stream. On occasion it trickles or meanders.
It takes maintenance to clear out the past, to get rid of the junk. After all, the past is anything and everything that is not in the immediate present moment.
http://www.keenehealth.net/
http://www.theabcsofadhd.com/
Those of you who know me on a personal level, through my websites, or from the Helping Others Heal Naturally newsletter know that I am an advocate of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). Through the discovery of EFT, I began to reflect on likely causes of my blockages- the writings on my wall.
God knows there were many possibilities to consider.
As a child trouble seemed to follow me. I wasn't really a bad kid. I just exhibited some behaviors that ticked off some people. People like my teachers, parents, and maybe a few others.
Although the discovery of ADHD had been around, to my knowledge nobody I knew was familiar with or used the term. Looking back, I am certain that I met the criteria for the label since I had the classic "out of the textbook" symptoms.
I must confess that I continue to have many of the symptoms today. However, I have learned to manage them and lead a somewhat normal life-whatever normal means.
Clearing out the junk stored in my unconscious (that raised its ugly self-sabotaging head now and again) got the energy flowing. Not that it flows like a young stream. On occasion it trickles or meanders.
It takes maintenance to clear out the past, to get rid of the junk. After all, the past is anything and everything that is not in the immediate present moment.
http://www.keenehealth.net/
http://www.theabcsofadhd.com/
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